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Worship – Part 2 – I Must Decrease

Posted in Spiritual Growth, Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , , , , on March 28, 2013| Leave a Comment »

I started reading a book recommended by our local Christian radio morning show that dealt with removing the excess from our lives.*  What caught my attention was a verse from the gospel of John:

 

“He must increase, but I must decrease.” John 3:30 (KJV)

The author made the point of saying that when she decreased the “stuff” in her life, God was able to come in and increase His work in her.

 

Immediately, the word “worship” came to mind.  The second part of worship is possibly the most important, yet works hand in hand with the first (giving God our very best).  It’s the excess of self, meaning the attitudes and motives of why I do what I do.

 

It is hard to have a wrong motive in doing household chores but, a grumbling attitude can certainly crop up.  Even attending church can bring about a complacent attitude.  For crying out loud, I have been going to church for 43 years.

 

The Israelites lost their “awe” of God and the reason why they were to do things a certain way.  Even the tithe or lack thereof was selfishness.  They wanted to keep the best maybe out of fear of not having enough.

 

I find myself, at times, losing the same “awe” struck wonder in worshiping God. I go because  it’s what I do (habit), not because I have joy to go and worship God with fellow believers.

 

In the book of Acts, Ananias and Sapphira saw tons of people selling everything they had for the spread of the gospel.  They thought “Well let’s sell all we have, but they don’t need all of it. We will give most so we can look good but keep some for ourselves.  Besides no one will know.” (Christine’s edition)

 

Problem was God knew, and He wasn’t pleased.  He didn’t care if they kept some, but it was the deceit of their hearts.  They wanted to look like holy people but their hearts were full of pride and lies (the excess of self) that it killed them, literally.

 

As a writer or Bible study facilitator it’s easy for self to increase and become puffed up, if I’m not careful. Even as a parent, comparing myself to others can allow haughtiness to grow.  “I would never let me child to that!” or “My children don’t act that way.  It must be the way I raise them.”

 

There is another side of me that can turn to excess of self and that is affirmation. I have a great need to be affirmed.  Words of affirmation are my “love” language.* But it can also go to the extreme. What once was an outpouring of love from another can quickly turn into pride in my heart.

 

When I take self out of the equation– whether it be desires, or motives–my heart says, “Yes Lord, take control, do what You will.” He becomes more visible to those around me and I become invisible.  My lifestyle of worship will be acceptable to Him.

 

When I decrease (my attitudes, my motives, my desires), God will certainly increase and that is the way it should be.

 

How about you?  What motives and attitudes do you have when doing everyday activities? Work?  Ministry? Or going to a church service?

 

Ask God to show you any hidden motives that are hindering Him working in and through  you. Then ask Him for the strength to get rid of self so others can see Jesus.

 

 

“All a man’s ways seem innocent to him,

But motives are weighted by the LORD.”

Proverbs 16:2 (NIV 1984)

*Jen Hatmaker “7: An Experimetnal Mutiny Against Excess”  

*Gary Chapman “The Five Love Languages”

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What’s Your Identity?

Posted in Encouragement, Spiritual Growth, Uncategorized, tagged , , , , on January 14, 2013| Leave a Comment »

Each of us, if we are of driving age, has a driver’s license, to identify who we are, what our age is and where we live. Even our schools provide each student with a number and ID card so the schools (here in my county it starts from elementary school up) know whose grades belong to whom and which student belong to which school.

Many people today, if not most, carry other identities, such as lawyer, accountant, manager, or even bus driver. These identities become their success, what makes them important, in the eyes of the world.

I have always struggled with my identity from the time elementary school through middle and high school into college. It didn’t help that I had to overcome a learning disability in elementary school. I had to be and do something to be important. So I tried everything. I think I changed my degree four or five times in college and then only received a two year degree.

I use to tell God “I need to go back to school to get my degree.” The reason is, if something happened to Mike the only job I could get was a minimum wage one. There is no way I can do anything without a degree. I don’t know how many times I looked at friends, even my husband, and was jealous because they got a degree. I saw myself as a failure for most of my life.

This transferred to my relationship with God. The more I did for Him, the more important I was, and the more He loved me. So I thought. My life got to the point that I was involved in four ministries at once, not to mention the one at home to my family. That was okay, because I was doing God’s work and He was going to accept me and think I was important.

In reality, I burned out. I didn’t know who I was anymore than before, due to being pulled in so many directions. I lost sight of who I truly was. Looking back, there has always been desire to find my niche. The longing to find something I really enjoyed doing, was so strong, I couldn’t say no to anything. I needed to find it.

God is patient. It took me a long time to understand where my true identity and success comes from. He had to take me out of everything to learn one simple thing; I am important, and my identity is that I am His child. I show I belong to Him by obeying His word and being an example to those around me.

Incidentally, through one of those ministries, I did find something I loved to do. I put together newsletters for our church’s MOPS (Mother of Preschools) program, writing articles to encourage those who I ministered to. I love putting words together to encourage others in their spiritual walk as well as facilitating Bible studies. But I do still have to be cautious that writing or teaching doesn’t become my sole identity. I wouldn’t be able to do this if it weren’t for God. I have also learned to take breaks and say “no” and my number one priority is my family.

Do you struggle to know who you are? Do you find that your job, hobby or even your family have become your identity? If those were taken from you today, who would you be?

If you’re one of God’s children, that is who you are. There is nothing more important than that. If the activities and “things, you use to form your identity were taken away, you would still be His child and be important to Him.

Ask Him today to make Himself real to you and to see who you really are in Him. He longs for you to know exactly that.

Place your name in the blank.

For you                       did not receive a spirit that makes you a slave again to fear, but you                  received the Spirit of sonship/daughtership*. And by him we cry “Abba Father.  The Spirit himself testisfies with our spirit that we are God’s children.  Now if                           is his child, then                       is an heir – an heir of God,  and co-heir with Christ…”  Romans 8: 15-17a (NIV)

*added for emphasis

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A Child for the Weary and Burdened

Posted in Encouragement, Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , , on December 22, 2012| 1 Comment »

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart and you will find rest for your souls.” Matthew 11:22 (NIV1984)

Over the past few weeks I have been “weary” and “burdened”.  It started with a visit to the ER and over night stay in the hospital, finding out that the chest pains I was having were panic attacks.  But then depression set it.  Unfortunately this had been going off and on for a few months.  I couldn’t get moving on the things I needed to do nor the things I had a passion for (hence the lack of entries).  There was also the lack of desire to socialize, paranoia about what others thought about comments I made when forcing conversations, and crying at the drop of a hat.  Even though it hurt, I knew God was with me and had a purpose for what I was going through.

I finally sought medical help and now I am starting to feel a little better.  Even cleaned my house and got the laundry done in two days.  Whoo-hoo!

There are times however, I am burdened and weary from something quite different. Sin.  I find myself doing some of the same “stupid” mistakes over and over again, like losing my temper.  I wonder when I am ever going to change.  I even ask God, “When is Jesus coming again? I’m tired of fighting the sin”.  It does get me down, and my Heavenly Father has to pick me up, brush me off, and wrap His arms of forgiveness around me.  Then, only if I allow Him, does He remove the feelings of guilt and replace it with peace restoring my joy.

Christmas is more than gifts, and family.  I am much less stressed when I remember the true reason for this holiday.

One starry night, two thousand years ago, God left all the riches in Heaven and became a little baby born in a barn. He was perfect in every sense of the word. He had ten fingers, ten toes, two sparkling eyes and little button nose.  What the world saw was just another baby.  What the parents saw was the Son of God they were to raise.  The only visitors he had were smelly shepherds who were told of his birth by angels and a few magi from the east a few years later.

He would prove that He was God’s Son, by healing the sick, raising the dead, giving sight to the blind and hearing to the deaf.  But His ultimate goal was to bring peace, comfort, and redemption to a sinful world that could not save its self.

This little baby was God in the flesh.  It tickles me when I see a baby around this time of year.  My imagination goes wild.  It’s amazing to me that my Savior was once a little one, who grew up and accepted the world for who they were no matter how bad or good they were.

That child brought hope, love and carried our burden to the cross because He loved each and every one of us.  He extends a gift to each person.  That gift is a relationship with Him and freedom from the guilt of our sin, and unconditional love and forgiveness.

If you have not accepted this free gift He extends to you.  Would you consider it?  I can’t promise He will take your problems away, relieve the depression or loss you may feel.  But what I can promise you is that He will be with you every step of the way.  He will give you the peace you may be seeking.

Take a few minutes and go to the tap “An Invitation” (at the top of the page) It will help you understand what is involved with accepting this gift.

From my family to yours, have a wonderful Christmas and a blessed New Year.

“For unto us a child is born to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulder.  And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace.”   Isaiah 9:6 (NIV 1984)

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Giving Thanks

Posted in Encouragement, Uncategorized, tagged , , , on November 22, 2012| 2 Comments »

Giving Thanks

Every year for Thanksgiving I usually sit down and write out a list of the things I’m thankful for. This year I want to share with you my list containing promises from His word.

He has adopted me as one of His children

Romans 8:15-16 “For I did not receive a spirit that makes me a slave again to fear, but I received the Spirit of daughtership. And by him I cry, “Abba, Father”. The Spirit himself testifies with my spirit that I am God’s child.”

He is always ready to forgive me

I John 1:9 “If I confess my sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive me of my sins and purify me from all unrighteousness”

He created me, and I am special to Him

Psalms 139:13, 14 “For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful I know that full well.”

He loves me with a love like no other

Jeremiah 31:3 “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with loving-kindness.”

His love for me is so deep that he gave up His own Son Jesus to pay a debt I couldn’t pay

John 3:16 “For God so loved Christine that he sent his only Son, that if Christine believes in him Christine shall not perish but have eternal life.”

Because His is my Father and loves me deeply He will discipline me so I may be more like His Son

Psalm 94:12 “Blessed am I whom you discipline, O Lord, the one you teach from your law.”

He sends blessings because He can

James 1:17 “Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does, not change like shifting shadows.”

When temptation comes, He will not allow it to be more than I am capable of handling in His strength

1 Corinthians 10:13 “No temptation has seized me except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let me be tempted beyond what I can bear. But when I’m tempted, he will also provide a way out so that I can stand up under it.

That even in the hard times, I will become more mature and complete if I allow Him to work

James 1:2-4 “Consider it pure joy, Christine whenever, you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of you faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

I am competent to do what He has called me to, because He gives me the competence

2 Corinthians 3:5, 6 “Not that I am competent in myself to claim anything for myself, but my competence comes from God. He had made me competent as a minister of a new covenant – not of the letter but of the Spirit, for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life.”

He makes the path clear to accomplish what He wants me to

Revelation 3:7 “These are the words of him who is holy and true, who holds the key of David. What he opens no one can shut, and what he shuts no one can open.”

I am His and nothing can take that from me

Romans 8:37-39 “No, in all these things I am more than a conqueror through him who love me. For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate me from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.”

The best promise, after my salvation, is that one day I will be with Him

Matthew 14:1-3 “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many room; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.”

Thank you Father, for the promises you give to us in your Word. They give us hope, peace and comfort. As we sit around our tables and give thanks for that we are that we have and what we do, may we give thanks for sacrifice your Son made so that we may live with you some day. May we be lights to the world that is in the dark?

In Your Son’s precious name

Amen

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

*All verses are from the NIV 1984

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Forgiveness – Not an Option

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , on November 5, 2012| 4 Comments »

My stomach turned. I hadn’t seen the couple in three years and I certainly didn’t want to see them now. I was going only because my daughter was playing in the game. By the time I arrived at church, dropped my daughter off, and parked I was crying almost to the point of hyperventilating.

You see this couple was going to adopt my niece. My family thought it was great. They changed her name in the school she was attending and allowed her to call them mom and dad. However, without any warning, two years later, they called and said we can’t do this and we are sending her back to you.

We were shocked and angry. This little one had been through enough, her father died of an overdose and her mother (my sister) was in prison. My parents adopted her instead. For months my niece would say “I want to go home, mommy and daddy did this or that, or listen to the funny things my brothers did.” I would clench with anger. It took everything in me to say absolutely nothing.

Over the past three years when I heard their name anger flared. They come down twice a year and see her and I  stay as far away as possible. In Matthew West’s song “Forgiveness“ he points out even when people tell me that I have a right to be angry and not forgive, it’s not what God asks of me.

As I sat in the car I realized that my overwhelming emotion, was not just the fact that I had to see them, but that God wanted me to forgive, not just right there and then but to their faces.

“If this is what you want God, I can’t do it. There is no way,” I said out loud trying to take a breath, “But if it’s what you want, I will, but You will have to give me the strength to do it.”

After the game, with my parents by my side I said, “Over the past three years I have been so resentful towards you, not for myself or my parents but for my niece. I know this is where God wants her. But as a Christian forgiveness is not an option. So I want to tell you I forgive you. This is a hard thing for me to do but there it is.”

When I walked to my other daughter’s game the tears flowed. This time it came from the shock of what transpired and the sense of freedom I had.

I think one reason God asks us to forgive is not for the benefit of the one forgiveness is extended to, but it’s for the one who is offering the forgiveness. It’s the hardest response we can give to some one who has hurt us, but there is no greater peace felt when we do.

How about you? Is there someone that has hurt you or someone you love? Have you been carrying resentment, bitterness and unforgiveness?

Take it to God today. He will give you the strength to forgive them whether it is face to face, over the phone or, just in acknowledgement to God. It maybe a moment by moment or situation by situation thing. Resentment will rear its ugly head again. Remember you have forgiven them and immediately take it to God. He’ll take care of it.

“Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.”

Ephesians 4:32 (NIV 1984)

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Focus, Focus, Focus

Posted in Spiritual Growth, Uncategorized, tagged , , on October 9, 2012| 2 Comments »

Lately, my life has been a blur. Not because of going too fast but because there is no motivation just a desire to do mind numbing things. This is not a fulfilling way to live.

One day I was working on a writing project, when something popped out at me on the computer screen. I found a title of a piece I had no memory of writing. Even worse , I discovered that it was listed in a book proposal that was submitted almost two months ago. The problem? I never wrote it.

I panicked and called my prayer partner. Her response was not what I expected.

She said, “Christine, when I prayed for you this morning, I felt God was telling me, ‘Pray for her to focus on Me.’ So that’s what I did.”

I was going to argue that I did focus on God, until I stopped to think about it. That’s what He had been telling me for the past month and a half and I chose not to listen. My focus had not been on Him, and because of that there was no direction for my days. So I took her words to heart.

It’s been three weeks since that conversation and it’s been a struggle. However, as I have refocused and genuinely sought Him out for direction, I’m slowly getting back on track. It will take time to catch up to where I was, but that’s ok, because it will be worth it. My house will be in order, and all the accomplishments (big and small) will be celebrated and God will receive the glory.

Are you days lacking direction and in disarray? Have you lost motivation to get things done? Maybe you have just taken your focus off of God.

Ask God to show you the source of the problem. But before you do, check your heart and make sure you’re ready to hear what He has to say.

“Unless the LORD builds the house (the day*), its builders labor in vain.
Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchmen stand guard in vain.”
Psalm 127:1 (NIV1984)

*added for emphasis

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Hate or Love – Choose

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , on September 22, 2012| Leave a Comment »

Today’s blog is stepping out of the norm for me.  It’s  a challenge rather then encouragement.  But because it has been so heavy on my heart, I wanted to share it with you.

Anger is a powerful emotion. It causes us to move toward making good changes or toward bitterness. But for me recently, my anger led to heartbreak and compassion for my community and for the world.

Lately on the news there has been much anger expressed. I was angry when I first read about the murders of our Ambassador to Libya and three others. But then a feeling of sadness enveloped me.

Why would a god ask for hatred and violence of anyone who was offended by what another person said about their beliefs? I have heard people say Christians would never do that when some one wouldn’t agree with our principles. Really?

As there are extremists in the Muslim world, there are extremists in Christianity. Take a look at the Spanish Inquisition or the Crusades. Some will say “Yeah that was hundreds of years ago, not now.” I ask again, really?

I’m thinking of the extremists that hold hateful and condemning signs at gay pride parades and abortion clinics, or even burning religious books and making films that were meant to offend, all in the name of freedom of speech and God. It has even entered into the political arena. I can’t tell you how tired I am of politics, mud slinging and the angry Facebook pages from both sides. We should be praying for our leader’s hearts to change toward, God and vote our beliefs.

I read in Scripture of a God who came to earth to walk among men to show the love He had to offer. He chose to mingle with the unlovables, the social outcasts of His day. He didn’t agree with the lifestyle or the religious fanaticism but He loved them anyway. Because He loved them where they were at, many were drawn to Him.

I’m not saying we shouldn’t stand up for what we believe. But look at the response to Chick-fil-a and their president who endorsed traditional marriage. Who made the bigger statement, the critics of the president or those who took a stand with him? There was no anger voiced by those who went out to support. Even the responding protest was almost non-existent. I turned on the news to see the response. The reporter was the only one there.

Yes, we need to speak the truth of God’s Word, but with love. One daughter has been asked about her God at school. Someone said they didn’t believe in her God because He hates gays.

“That’s not true,” my daughter said, “He loves them but does not like the choices they make.”

It’s called loving the sinner and hating the sin.

The day after I read the article on the Middle East, I read on Facebook “Pray for the victims’ families.” I think that is a given. How about praying for the enemies?

God is the perfect judge. One day everyone will be called before Him. It won’t be about what we have done in His name but what we have done with His Son Jesus that will make or break us. He will have His day to judge the world. For today though, as the church, and as Christians our job is to show His love to the world around us not be condemning but to speak the truth with love, not hate.

Which do you choose? Hate and anger? Or love and compassion? Are there people in you life that just know how to push the buttons and give you reason to be sarcastic with them? Are your words full of anger or love?

Ask God today to change your heart not just towards the big issues but the everyday stuff as well. Let’s be the vessel He uses to bring others to Him through love.

 

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal.  If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  IF I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always preserveres.”

I Corinthians 13:1-9 NIV 1984

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The Phantom of the Church

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , on September 12, 2012| 2 Comments »

One of my favorite musicals is the Phantom of the Opera. A man wears a mask because of his disfigured face, and falls in love with a young singer that he tutors. His thinking is that since he “gave her” the voice to sing, she would love him all the more. Instead he is a man who will never experience love because he tries to intimidate someone into loving him instead of being honest about who he really is.

It made me think about us as Christians. Many times we wear masks so others will not see the real us. We wear them to cover pain, insecurities and flaws. We fear that if others see who we really are we won’t be accepted.

God created us for a relationship with Himself. But He also knew we would need others. I wonder if the reason people don’t ask for help for prayer is because others will think of them as Christians without faith, or it is a sign of weakness.

I have learned that is exactly what the body of Christ is for. Verses like, “Where two or more are gathered in my name, I am with them.” Or “Bear one another’s burdens” come to mind.

At one time my family was going through a dark time. My husband’s mother was dying of cancer and I became a temporary single mother of three children ages 9, 8, and 3. He would leave the house at six in the morning for work and not get home until 10 at night from the hospital. I was so tired I couldn’t even work the microwave. One Sunday in our Sunday school I broke down crying and asked for prayer that God would give me strength to make it through the day. What I received was four nights of dinners. Those dinners gave relief from the stress and renewed energy for the days ahead. I had to remove the mask of the “good Christian” who could handle anything, and show my true struggles, which in turn released the burden emotionally as well as physically.

The church was meant to come together not only to worship God, but also to help each other. Of course there was a risk of being vulnerable. There always is. However, if I wasn’t transparent two things would have happened. First, people would not know the real me and the ways they could intercede on my behalf. Secondly, not only would I have cheated myself out of seeing God’s provision, I would have hindered others from receiving the blessing that comes from serving.

The Phantom in the musical chose to hide and to become feared instead of loved. But I wonder, if he had taken the risk of removing his mask and being vulnerable, people would perhaps have become more compassionate and loving. He may have even been freed from his prison of loneliness.

As Christians God asks us to remove the masks and live in the freedom of allowing other to see who we are and to risk the exposure of our flaws so that He may work in our lives through those around us.

Who knows by taking that risk we may help others take their masks off also

Are you hiding behind the mask of fear, or pride so other’s can’t see the real you or  hurting you? Ask the Father to help you take the mask off so you can show the real person God created you to be, hurts and all.   Warning: also ask God which details to share (some information should remain private).

“Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.”  Galatians 6:2 (NIV1984)

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God Walk

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , , , , on August 12, 2012| 2 Comments »

Last year I attended the Experiencing God Bible Study at our church. I would highly recommend it to anyone. One of the exercises was to do a “God walk”.  We were to go to a park or beach and talk to Him and listen for His voice. By the way, listening is hard.

While I walked and prayed I met up with my niece and her third grade class. I had forgotten that they would be there. My niece had asked if I would go and I told her no. The leaders asked if I wanted to join them and again I said no, that I was there for a Bible Study assignment, a prayer walk. The leaders were gracious. One even said, “Tell Him I will talk to Him later.”

I didn’t get more than a few yards, and guilt overwhelmed me. I felt God prodding me back to the group. I didn’t want to. He reminded me that I had asked a few minutes prior why I was doing this. What did He want me to do or say? I gave in and turned back. In the end I apologized to my Father and the leaders for my prideful response. I also made my niece’s day.

I tried to do a “God Walk” every month. Needless to say it went by the way side.

Fast forward a year. A few months ago, I was struggling in every area of my life; my priorities, being  a mother, a wife and as a writer. I felt in my spirit I needed to take a “God Walk”. Strange how God works, the day I made the decision, I started a new Bible study entitled “The Circle Maker”. That night the assignment was to find a place, and time to pray every day for twenty-one days and pray for one situation or person (my personality won’t let me do that so there were several people/issues I chose).  Through this study we learned how to pray hard (persistence), bold (asking for the impossible) and pray for God’s sovereign will.

I chose seven in the morning and to walk around the block (less likely to be distracted). It reminded me of Genesis, and how God walked with Adam and Eve and the intimacy they had with the Father. The first time I poured my heart out. When I got back I felt renewed and excited to see how the Father would answer in unexpected ways.

The “God Walk” is becoming a new habit. When I don’t do it, I find that my day is miserable. It has provided me a new way of connecting with God. I am beginning to recognize His voice, praying scripture and trusting My Father will answer even if it is the impossible.

Do you spend time just praying and listening? He desires time with us to grow our relationship with Him.

Set up a time or place (it doesn’t have to be a walk) to just talk to the Father.

“And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.”
Ephesians 6:18

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Erecting Pillars

Posted in Uncategorized, tagged , , on July 30, 2012| Leave a Comment »

It’s often said that we need to forget the past and move forward. In a sense I think that is right, but even God had the Israelites erect pillars.  When their children saw the pillar of rocks  the parents would be able to  give an account of what God had done for them. By telling the story, it would give hope and build their children’s faith for when the hard times came their trust would be in God. Joshua instructed the pillar to be a memorial for the Israelites (Joshua 4:1-7).

Allow me share one of mine.

A few days ago my mother brought over several of my report cards. Ugh! In elementary school they were curses. As I looked at them the tears welled up. D-, C-, D+ and a B here and there. In most cases they were earned, but in fourth grade they weren’t. Some should have been F’s, but I cheated, blatantly. I’m surprised no one tattled.

Granted it was wrong, but at that time it was survival. You see, I had a learning disability, a form of Dyslexia. In those days Dyslexia wasn’t a “real” issue. Others like me were labeled as rebellious, immature and having an attitude of not wanting to learn. I hated school so much I punched  myself in the stomach, so I wouldn’t have to lie about having tummy aches.

In fifth grade I changed schools and entered a program called the Discovery Center. My teacher, Ms. Lydia, met with me twice a week and helped re-train my brain so I could learn better.  She treated me with respect, love, and patience.  I ended up graduating high school fifteenth in my class, and with high honors.

For Christmas one year I made her a sampler of some of the exercises we use to do on the chalk board.

Cross stitch sampler

 A couple of years ago Lydia sent me the sampler. I framed it and put it on my desk as a pillar of remembrance.  When I sit at my desk I see the sampler it and I’m reminded of two things. First, if God could help me through a learning disability, He could help me through anything.

Secondly, it keeps me humble. There is no way I would be where I am today if God did not provide a teacher who understood what I needed and a program that would help me overcome the challenges I faced.  It would probably still be a great effort to read, or even memorize one verse never mind the whole book of James, which I am in the process of doing.

It doesn’t mean I dwell on the negative aspects of poor grades and special classes, but I can certainly praise Him for them. I have been able to share those times with my children to help them understand God does work in amazing ways.

Are there pillars in your life that once were a negative experience for you, but now can see where God worked in your life?   Thank God for them and share them when the opportunity presents itself. It may draw someone to seek God.

“…These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever.” Joshua 4: 7 (NIV 1984)

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